Monday, May 23, 2011

Flashback

I was rummaging through my myspace (yes I still have it, I just never get on it), and found this blog post. It's dated October 5th, 2006:


I want to be a real woman:

"A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and graps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 'Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.' Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." -Proverbs 31: 10-31

This is what I want to be. I don't need the media or this world to tell me what I have to do to be a real woman:

"Real women have curves. Real women drink. Real women are OK with casual sex. Real women have educations. Real women have a corner-office."

I don't buy that. I know now what I want to be in life. I want to be a Godly, respected wife. And respected by the people that matter: my family, my church and my God. I want to be different. I don't want to be the wife that everyone on base has something bad to say about. I don't want to be the girl that you have to hold her hair back while she throws up and then goes for another drink. I don't ever want to give anyone a reason to accuse of me of anything against my husband. If they know me, I want them to know who I serve. I want them to see theres something different about me. I want my husband to be able to say "I have a virtuous wife". No, I don't know what career I want to have, be it a writer, photographer, waitress or whatever. But the next time somebody asks me "What do you want to do with your life," I'll direct them to the above verses.


I don't think I'm there yet. I was 18 when I wrote that. I think it's funny that I mentioned being a waitress never thinking that I would actually be one. Haha. I found a couple more blog posts, mostly from when Chris was deployed, that I might post later.


My 18-year-old self:

1 comment:

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